How close should we live to our children?

you vs kids

Your family vs your life

The family is important and with retirement coming, we have to think of where we will live.

My husband and I have been living in Egypt for 30 years, well, he is from here. Times are changing, he will retire in a few months and I started to tell him, “I’ve spent 30 years in your country, time to spend time in mine.” I miss my kids and my grandchildren.  I think back to what life would have been like if we lived near them all these years. Yes, I would not have missed all the special moments in their lives but then again, the ones that mattered, we were there.  Life takes over for most of us and everyone is living it. We enjoy traveling to visit them but also to travel other places in the world.

I remember when my parents lived far from me when my boys were young, those were the days I was living a “normal” life.  I wished they could be with us more, mostly because my husband’s family was always there for every birthday and holiday. I now understand they were living their lives just as I was and they were entitled to enjoy their retirement.

Do we live near our children?


Now it’s my turn, my wonderful husband says he just wants me to be happy.  Boy, that’s a hard one. I want to see my grandson enjoy everything but then I also realize, I did that with my kids and it’s their turn. My two sons live in the Northeast so there is snow and rain.  I love sun and water, not coming from the sky.  That is where I’m happy .

Hubby and I decided to live in both places, we can go back and forth whenever we want. With both of us retired airline people, the cost of  flying is almost nothing.Worked for my parents, they just weren’t twelve hours away by plane. But, it’s only a plane ride away, even if we live in the south of the US. A plane ride away. Meanwhile, we can do the things we enjoy. If we’re happy then the kids will be happy.

How involved should we be?

I’ve always told me boys, they should be thankful I’m not living near them. As a mom, I am a “normal” mom, I worry about them, are they happy, who are they dating, how is work, etc. With new technology  we can SMS, What’s app, Skype Messenger all the time, so we can keep up with what they are doing. All of this makes life so much better and keeps family close..

I know many parents like to be around their children and grandchildren but do we need to be that close? I mean, do we give up what we enjoy to live our lives all together?  I’m beginning to think the older we get, we have earned the right to enjoy our lives, what we have left. I think we have a few years before we have to sit in a rocking chair so why not keep living and exploring this world?  Even if it’s just getting into a car and driving, we love to do that.

Over the years, I’ve had contact with my boys when they just needed to talk and ask my advice, sometimes they even ask my husband. lol Holidays are always family time. I feel close to them, as long as I get to see them everry six months.  If you lived in California and your kids live in New York, what is the difference, you’re not up the sstreet from them?


My sons and grandson, the only time I enjoy the snow!

What is right for you?

As I write this I realize, everyone has their own thoughts on this. Many people have stayed close to home most of their life.  It comes down to what is right for you, always wanting to see and experience the world from a young age, I don’t settle down easy. I think you can have both, as long as I can be in the sunshine and beach!

I’m wondering what you all think?  What is the best for you? Are you adventurous or more of a homebody?


2 Responses to “How close should we live to our children?

  • Great read! We have very tight family relations here in the Philippines like many Asian countries. We preferred to live with our parents even after they retired under the same roof because we want to take care of them ourselves when they grow older instead of looking for a retirement facility for them.

    • I so wish more Americans would think that way. As an senior person, as long as I can take care of myself, I’ll be happy. That’s another reason to stay healthy…lol Glad you passed by.

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